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My head is spinning my ear is ringing

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May. 30th, 2003 | 02:25 am
mood: nauseatednauseated

Since Saturday I haven't been able to consistently hear out of my left ear. In a brief moment I will hear a sound like water sloshing about, and my hearing will either come, or go. It has been disorienting me a lot. I get dizzy. Today I was trying to play the matrix game I rented last night, and I got such severe motion sickness that I ran to the bathroom expecting to puke. Instead I got a painful dry heave, and my vision went funky for a few seconds. It was like a bunch of tiny little moving spots where I couldn't see right. If that kind of thing goes on for a whole minute I know I will have a massively bad headache. Which has only happened 3 times in my life that I can think of. While I was sitting on the air vent on the bathroom floor hoping that my vision would come back quickly I made a decision. I am going to make getting healthy again my top priority. I remember in highschool when I would think nothing of riding my bike 8 miles to a friends house knowing that I would have to ride back. I weigh about 100lbs more than I did at the end of highschool. My time eroded away. Life became far more stressful. I was worn out tired when I got home from work. Rather than use exercise to relieve stress I ate. I stopped taking my ADD speed. So many things just turned my from the string bean I had always been into the guy I am today. Now that I have taken care of the emotional causes I think cure my problem, but it is going to take a long time. Fixing my activity level would be pretty hard if my ear problem persists. Yesterday I couldn't play basket ball vary long before I was in a daze. I think changing my eating habits will be much harder. I eat whatever is easy before I bother to make something, and then whatever is easiest will almost always win. I love cheese, and I have eaten at Pizza Schmizza so often that they know what slice I will want given the random selection in the window that day. They also greet me by name. I wear T-shirts they gave me.

I'm learning a lot of stuff that could help me change career paths. I'm pleased at how fast I am learning. I'm building a linux system from source code, and it is giving me a pretty good overview of how the different parts work. I think I have a few weeks left of learning before I will feel confident enough to write a new resume, and apply for jobs I felt under qualified for in the past.

Some great friends I haven't seen in a long time are going to be in town this weekend. Best friend Big Ben moved to Boston in order to keep employment. And Becca, who was the first person I met in real life after I got to know her because of LJ. I have known her less than a year, but she is already a great friend who I tell most of my secrets. Actually I don't know if we have gone a whole week since we met without chatting. Well probably when I moved, and didn't have a computer set up right away. She has been learning in NYNY, and so I haven't seen her in a semester.

Oh in case I didn't mention it I do have an appointment with a doctor tomorrow. I'm not just complaining, and not doing anything about it.

I love most of you ;-)
[HUGS]
Dan

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